I made the coolest fucking website today

I made the coolest fucking web site in the world today. This one. The one you are looking at right now. If you didn’t know that then you’re a dumb-ass bitch. As matter of fact, this update is so fucking cool, I’m gonna keep on writing it. I don’t think you’re convinced that I am so fucking cool that it hurts your face. Here are some cool fucking pictures of shit that I deem cool and you will too.

Cool item 1: Dragons
Dragons! They are so fucking cool. The web site I stole this picture from is NOT cool, especially if they try to sue me. Lawsuits are deemed NOT cool.

Cool item 2: IROC-Z
The IROC-Z! What a coincidence, I rock too. And by “I rock” I mean that I am the fucking coolest passenger in the IROC-Z. And by “passenger” I mean “convicted driving while intoxicated victim.” Few people know this but, IROC stems from the Latin phrase coolest maximums, roughly translated means: I AM SO FUCKING COOL!

Cool item 3: Cage fightin
CAGE FIGHTIN! Cage fightin is so fucking cool it doesn’t even need a “g” at the end of it. The correct uses of present participles are deemed NOT cool.

So there you have it. The first ever update on the coolest web site in the world: iamsofuckingcool.com
No need to thank me for giving you this beautiful gift of coolness. More cool fucking updates to come!